Hey friends! I’m sitting here sipping on some tea after receiving the most glorious facial and am in an ultimate state of bliss. Whenever I get into moods like this, I know I need to write and this topic happens to be something that has been on my mind lately. Confidence and self-love. Two traits that can fuel our passions, bring us inner joy, and light the fire to everything we do. Unfortunately, they can also be really freakin’ hard to maintain. Does this sound familiar?
One day you’re feeling on top of the world, radiating all kinds of confidence when suddenly something goes unplanned. That awesome project you pitched at work was declined. Someone else got the promotion you’ve been working so hard for. Your friend who already seems to have everything just won the lottery. You and your significant other get in a huge fight. Your content that you spent hours shooting, editing and writing didn’t get any engagement on Instagram.
Doubt begins to creep in, followed shortly by fear, and many times, you begin to compare yourself to those around you. And let me tell you… nothing tears down confidence and self-love more easily than the comparison trap.
So here’s what I’ve come to realize. You of course can’t stop any negative thing from happening to you but you can change the way you react. Instead of focusing on what the world is doing, you can focus on building a routine so grounded in positivity, gratitude and joy that when little hurdles come your way you easily jump over them.
So what does it mean to water your own grass? Well, to me it meant building up my own confidence and creating a lifestyle based on wholesome, healthy habits. The more I practice the ten tidbits I’ve shared below, the happier I feel and the less I fall prey to doubt, fear or comparison. I hope these habits bring a little joy into your life and help you feel confident in your own bad-assery.
Open Your Mind
Sometimes our limited views of our own potential can be the greatest hurdle we face. Over the past few years, if I can attest to one thing it’s that the path to success is rarely straightforward. As new opportunities come your way, it’s best to approach them with an open mind and receiving heart… even if they’re different than your previous expectations. Be receptive to people, places and projects that are outside of your comfort zone. You never know what kind of joy they may bring if you aren’t open enough to invite them into your life in the first place.
Approach Everything With Gratitude
A grateful heart is one of the building blocks of self-love. Being thankful for what you do have, even when it seems like all hope may be lost, will help ignite the fire within you to move forward. Your confidence will grow, the love you have for yourself and others will continue to blossom, and the small (and large) bumps you hit on the road of life will become easier to face. Realistic optimism can go such a long way and it usually starts with gratitude.
Make Self-care A Priority
We move through life nurturing and tending to our relationships with other people and many times put self care on the back burner. It’s so important to take time to “re-fill” your cup so you have the loving energy necessary to give back to other people. When your tank is running on low because you’ve been neglecting your mind and body, it’s nearly impossible to show up for anyone else. Take time for you. It’s not lazy or entitled. It’s the best thing you can do for everyone.
Move Your Body
When we’re little, we’re full of energy. We run around, we jump and play, we tumble and get right back up. And then we get older and we end up sitting all day — in cars, at our desk, on our couch, etc. Providing our body with proper exercise is not only crucial for our overall health and well-being, but it’s also an incredible way to build confidence and release stress. It doesn’t have to be some crazy, trendy workout. Pick a type of movement that you love: walking, running, dancing, stretching, etc. and do it daily.
Establish A Better Relationship With Money
I know money seems to be a taboo topic. You don’t want to come off greedy so you say you don’t need it, but then you’re faced with hardships when it’s not around. So let’s get really real. We need money to survive and to thrive. Get comfortable with your money, know where it’s coming from and how much you should be saving. Don’t treat it as a necessary evil… treat it as a reward for the work you put in! Talk to a financial consultant, invest in webinars, and learn as much as you can about building wealth so that you can stop worrying about money and start focusing on doing the things you want to do.
Say Yes To Things That Scare You
“Your comfort zone is where dreams go to die.” I read that quote somewhere and I laughed because as morbid and dramatic as that sounds, it’s true. If we’re truly dreaming big how can we possibly stay within the confines of what’s comfortable to us? We need to shake things up, get uncomfortable, push past our fears and say “YES” to those terrifying but awesome opportunities that come our way. Without change there is no growth and as scary as change can be, it’s one of the biggest confidence builders you can ask for.
Find The Silver Lining
No one wants to be the one friend who constantly complains about everything. It’s easy to fall into a hole of self pity but eventually you’ll need to climb out of there and brush yourself off. No, this doesn’t mean you have to be a ray of sunshine all the time, that’s simply unrealistic. However, you can be someone who tries to find the silver lining to any negative situation. It will not only make you feel more confident but I guarantee it’ll also put other people’s minds at ease if they’re going through a similar experience.
Practice Mindfulness Daily
We are moving in a fast paced society and our attention spans are shrinking daily. We’ve grown numb to the beautiful sensations around us and over time, if we never acknowledge them, we won’t recognize them for the miracles they are. Take time to disconnect, sit in stillness, savor your food, watch the sunset, etc. You don’t have to meditate to practice mindfulness. You just have to observe and acknowledge the things around you and the feelings they trigger within.
It’s been scientifically proven that smiling makes you happier! Smiling also reduces stress, makes you more approachable, and it’s super contagious. Be that person who radiates so much positivity and great energy that you light up any room you’re in. Feel free to be your happiest self. It’s the ultimate expression of confidence and self-love.
Throw Kindness Like Confetti
Be kind to everyone. Even if you don’t want to, even if they’ve wronged you and even if you’re in the sourest of moods. By choosing kindness, you’ll start favoring cooperation over competition, which may lead to some beautiful friendships and collaborations. Even the tiniest daily acts of kindness will not only improve your own mood, but could make such a difference for someone else. What I’ve come to find is that the more kindness you’re willing to give to other people, the more compassionate you will also be with yourself.
Honestly, in my opinion, kindness and compassion are the two biggest keys to loving yourself more fully.
Well loves, that’s it for now. I hope you find this post to be helpful in your self-love and confidence building journey and leave you with lots of good vibes. I’m so thankful to be able to share my thoughts with each and every one of you, so thank you for being here and for all your endless support.
With love and light,